Kurt Browning and Friends: Demons

Earlier this evening I caught myself watching televised figure-skating, I mean, not for a really long time but too long, ya know? I was just sitting here being not entertained but I continued to sit, just staring, just being nothin’, brain-dead. I’m grateful that the landlord I named Harvey rang the door-bell that woke me from my coma. If he wouldn’ta rang I would’ve been stuck here, bin melted into a pool of skin, hair, fat and ugly cartoon letters. But good old Harvey saved me-- not soon enough though; not before 15 minutes of pseudo-sport/quasi-entertainment/legitimate torment had passed. OK, figure-skating, the Olympic variety isn’t great but you know if Elvis or Babushka or whoever can land a “Quad” or win a Gold medal or something difficult-- something that pushes them further or is always a challenge to them, then I can appreciate it-- I mean, not ‘'enjoy it'’ completely but you know, I can understand its merits and get behind it a bit more. But this, I'’m sitting here watching Kurt Browning, Elvis Stojko, and Brian Orser (Jesus, I know their names!) skate as “professionals”(Ugh, I can distinguish between figure-skating ‘pros’ or figure-skating ‘ams’!) doing some Dirty-Dancing, gay-assed skate-dance skit where they all act like 50’s Greasers or sum junk-- well, I don'’t know where I’m going here (further proof that its rotting me)... but it revolts me and makes me whine and laugh and punch the seat beside me and strains my already strained eyes. Seriously, I can barely imagine a more convincing Hell--- fuck, Michael Bolton(lost the locks) is singing “'Live'” on top of it all? As these bastards skate around, flirting with each other, totally ready to drop their pants-- all the while, draining me- mesmerizing me, making me fall in love with them I want tio kiss elvis sjdf ! Ok, not really but the truth is its making me fucking nuts! I guess the penalty is fitting though, I mean, I should kick that fucking budget tv in--its not mine though. Fuck, I wouldn'’t anyway, who’ am I kiddin’. I’'m really getting mad--really mad, really! Kill! Punch them in the head! Punch the seat again!